No Rights. Journal of a Christ soldier.

Stuck At The Crossroads: Discerning the call to full time ministry.

There you are, standing and the crossroads. Down one road is a life of full time ministry with all of its joys and sacrifices.  Down the other road is life in the secular workforce with all of its benefits and drawbacks. Pressing down on you are huge questions, “Am I cut out for full time ministry? What about my college degree? What about my parent’s hopes and dreams for me? Is full time ministry always God’s best option for us? Is the choice to do secular work an unspiritual one? How can I make the right decision with so many seemingly good options?” Sound familiar? If so, know that you are not alone in wrestling with these questions. Many have stood right where you are standing. God took care of them. He will take care of you.

In fact, Jenny stands right where you are standing, now. Jenny graduated 6 months ago and she is still struggling to figure out her next step. She has changed her mind 3 times already. She really likes the idea of being a missionary in Central Asia. She also sees a lot of practical good in working for a while to pay off her college loans. And then there is the chance to join InterVarsity staff. They all seem like good and right options. She feels stuck and overwhelmed with the weight of the decision. It’s so hard to decide. She is stuck wondering why God doesn’t make it easier?

Discerning God’s will for our future is a heart wrenching crossroads. If only God would just clearly write the answers in the sky for us. This would make the whole process a no-brainer, right? But then it would also be a no-faith-er, too. And maybe that’s the point. Being stuck at the crossroads doesn’t mean hope is gone and God has checked out. You can be confident that God is not distant and aloof. He is always present and available to you. His silence is not a lack of care. Just the opposite is true. His silence challenges us to trust Him and lean on Him in the middle of the uncertainty and struggle. His presence is our confidence to move forward and take positive steps towards discerning our path.

The good news is that there is help with all these tough questions. While there is no surefire spiritual formula for discerning our calling, there is a way forward. There are solid principles in Scripture that can help us discover God’s intent for our lives. In particular, Romans 12:1-8 gives us solid principles to follow when we, like Jenny, find ourselves stuck at the vocational crossroads.

The first 2 verses lay the groundwork for our attitude and motivation. Our lives are meant to be worship to the King. No matter what we do in life it should be worship to the King. We cannot move forward until we first have our minds and hearts set on pleasing Him. George Mueller said it best, “Nine-tenths of the difficulties are overcome when our hearts are ready to do the Lord’s will whatever it may be. When one is truly in this state, it is usually but a little way to the knowledge of what His will is.” The world has a completely different agenda for us. We cannot serve God by following the world’s agenda. We must submit ourselves wholly to the King and His agenda. This is the first and biggest step to discerning God’s will for our lives.

The next step is critical. Paul spells it out in verses 3-8. We need to view ourselves with sober judgment. In other words we need some self-knowledge. We need to understand God given design; our abilities and strengths, as well as our weaknesses. When you lack self-knowledge you put yourself in danger of making really bad decisions about your future. Viewing ourselves wrongly prevents us from connecting into that natural divine groove that God has made us for.

Steven had his mind set on going to seminary. Yet, none of his closest friends or ministry leaders could confirm that Steven was really cut out for full time ministry. Steven had convinced himself that he could do full time ministry even though he had never had much success in the ministry that he had been involved with throughout college. Steven lacked sober judgment. And despite reliable counsel to do otherwise, Steven went ahead and entered seminary. Unfortunately he did not last long. He dropped out after a year. All he ended up with was a large school bill.

Steven, like many of us, made the mistake of viewing ministry as a more spiritual path than a secular job. This is a false dichotomy, though. Here in Romans 12, Paul is very clear that there is no difference between those in full time ministry and those in the secular workforce. Janitors, CEO’s, Doctors and full time ministers are all equal in the body of Christ. It is all a matter of gifting. And gifting is a matter of grace. Grace is the sovereign work of God. There isn’t anything that we can do to determine our spiritual gifting. So there is no room for boasting no matter how we are designed.

Sober judgment requires us to take a long, hard, honest look at ourselves. Before we can choose between ministry and any other profession, we need to look at our gifts and abilities as God sees them not as we see them and especially not as we want to see them.  We need to look for our actual gifting not the gifting that we have always thought would be really cool. And we must avoid dismissing abilities out of self-doubt.  We hurt ourselves when we think more or less of ourselves than is genuinely true. Both pride and low self-esteem are enemies of accurate discernment.

Here are five key questions that you can ask yourself in order help view yourself with clear levelheaded judgment in relation to full time Christian ministry:

1. What kind of a leader are you? This is a question of character not produce. Are you teachable and faithful? Have you done well with previous ministry roles and assignments? Are you able to serve humbly and care for others needs above your own? Your character as a leader is everything in ministry. Good ministry leaders are faithful, available and teachable.
2. What has been your ministry experience? Have you seen fruit from your service in previous ministry positions? Do people follow your leadership? Have you been able to influence people to make key decisions in their lives? Do people come to you for advice and help? People gifted in the area of ministry will stand out in a crowd. If you were to ask a random participant in your previous ministry who the most influential people were, that list would point directly to who is gifted in ministry. Would your name be on that list?
3. What do others think of you? We often have a lot of trouble seeing our own strengths and weaknesses. We need reliable friends to speak truth to us in order to see ourselves more clearly. Do others think we are cut out for full time ministry? What about those that know us best? When asking people for their opinion it is critical to ask them to be honest and not just tell us what they think we want to hear.
4. Why do you want to do ministry? This is a question of motives. Assuming that you have some desire to do ministry, you need to dig a little deeper. It is important to remember that we will never have pure motives for anything we do. Still, we need to check our motives as much as we can. Why do you really want to do ministry? Too often there exists a false dichotomy in our minds between full time ministry and lay leadership. The truth is that one is not more spiritual than the other. We are all missionaries in God’s Kingdom. It doesn’t matter what our job or role is, we are all equal in the body of Christ. Do we want to be in full time ministry because we think it is more spiritual than secular work?
5. Do we have a genuine concern for people? Ministry is primarily about people. Ministry is about influence. If you have trouble developing relationships and interacting with people then you will struggle to influence people in ministry.  In the course of normal conversations, do you struggle to ask people questions about themselves? Or do you pull most conversations back to yourself? Do you wait for others to ask you questions? It does not matter whether you are an introvert or an extrovert. Both can do ministry. However, the critical question is how well you pay attention to the needs of others above your own. A minister is a shepherd.  If we struggle to care for others practically then we will struggle in full time ministry.

Here is the really good news about this crossroads: If you set your heart on pleasing God, He will not let you make the wrong decision. He has promised to lead us in the direction that He wants us to go. (Psalm 32:8, Proverbs 3:5,6) His guidance may be slower and more in direct than you want, but He will keep you on His path. After all, we are His workmanship, created to do His works (Ephesians 2:10). If we are eager to do His will, why wouldn’t He want to direct us?  

I Hate Public Speaking!

 

I really hate public speaking. I hate it because it scares the crap out of me. Even after 14 years of ministry (and a speech minor in college) I still get so nervous before a talk that I practically hyperventilate. I hate that feeling. I really do. Unfortunately, avoiding any kind of public speaking is not an option for me in my career. So I do it. But I hate it. Did I mention that already?

Honestly, I do it because I have to do it. I do it because it is my job and, in spite of this ugly reality, I really do love my job as a minister. I also do it because I believe in the power of the spoken word to bring about transformation and change especially when it comes to preaching God’s Word. I do it because people need to hear me lead from up front in order to win their trust as a leader. And I do believe that God can use me when I speak His Word in public. But I still hate it. I hate being scared. It is humiliating. And at this point in my life, I really don’t like being scared or humiliated. 

I have given up any hope for getting rid of the overwhelming feeling of dread and anxiety that floods my reality the entire week before (and especially just before) I have to give a talk or sermon.  So this is not a self help blog. After 14 years, I think I can safely say that there is no cure for my fear of public speaking. My body is physically allergic to it. The introvert in me is simply too dominant. There is hope, however. While there is no cure, there is help and lots of it. I realize that this sounds very simplistic, but God is all the help we will ever need.

More specifically, I believe the help is found in the very nature and character of God. He is good and He truly cares about us. He is our perfect Father. Because He is good and because He loves us, He cares about our needs and feelings. He cares in a very real way. Jesus communicated this fact to us in Luke chapter 11 as He was teaching on the topic of prayer. In Luke 11, verse 5 through 13, Jesus gives us two analogies that explain God’s heart towards our need. After teaching His disciples how to pray he gives them two examples.

First, He tells them about a person who seeks out help from his friend in the middle of the night. The friend only responds when the seeker shows himself to be a persistent person. Now, I have always believed that Jesus was just trying to tell us to be persistent in our prayers, to persevere in them no matter how long it takes for God to answer. This might be true in some sense. However, I don’t think this is the point of this story. The point is not that we can manipulate God into answering our requests by simply being persistent. The focus of the story is not on the persistence but rather on the character of the friend. This so called “friend” was not a very good friend at all. He was lazy and didn’t want to help the seeker. He only helped because the seeker was persistent. I think the point here is that if this bad and lazy friend helped the seeker with his need then how much more likely is God to answer us when we come to Him with our needs?! This interpretation makes much better sense of the second example Jesus uses.

In the second story, Jesus brings the point home even harder. He talks about the relationship between a Father and a helpless child. There is not a more applicable example of the power difference between us and God than this one. And if an earthly, imperfect, evil father knows how to give good gifts then how much more likely is God to give us good gifts. He is our Father, afterall. If we are capable of caring for and sympathizing with our children’s needs then how much more capable is God?! The point of the stories is that even a bad friend and an evil father will respond to requests with good gifts eventually so, of course, God will answer our requests with good gifts!

This story reminds me of camping with our children. Our middle son is afraid of a lot of things that go on in the dark. So he is not so keen on sleeping in a tent out in the middle of the woods. Prior to the trip he sincerely liked the idea of camping with us. He wanted to be brave and sleep in the tent but his fear just gets the best of him at times. So what should my response be to his anxiety? Do I dismiss it and tell my seven year old to just tough it out? Or do I avoid camping altogether for the sake of his fear? I chose neither. Because I sincerely love my son, I chose to take him camping. I assured him that I would be with him the whole time and I slept right next to him the whole weekend. I took extra care to comfort him throughout the experience. As a result he made it through without any problems. He actually enjoyed the whole weekend and wants to go again. So, if I can be a decent father to my son just imagine how much more God can take care of us?

Here is the hope for us who have fears of any kind. God cares about our fear because He really cares for us. He cares about our needs. And He will respond to our needs in good ways. All we have to do is close our eyes and trust God to take care of us. Often times, I have found that He does not take away our feeling of fear or remove us from the circumstances that cause us to be afraid. But rather, He encourages us to trust Him in the midst of the fear. He will even help us to trust Him if we ask. 

I think this is exactly the message that David is communicating to us in Psalm 23. In verse 4 he proclaims that he will not fear even though he walks through the valley of the shadow of death.  His lack of fear is not because he decided to stop being afraid or even because God zapped it out of him. His lack of fear comes directly from his trust in God’s rod and staff. These represent the power and tender care of God. Because God is who He is, David does not have to fear even the scariest of life’s predicaments.

Of course, this is not easy. Trusting in God is easier said than done. However, it starts when we choose to seek God for help. Trust develops when we choose to dwell on God’s power and love rather than the circumstances that we fear.

This doesn’t mean I have to ever like public speaking. I never will. But it does mean that I can do it through God’s help. 

Church Buildings Gone Right!

It is my pleasure to report a very encouraging story that I recently read. it is about a church making radically misisonal choices about how to treat their property and finances. Considering the nature of my last article, in which I was ranting about a church that was abusing its resources, this story was renewing and hopeful for me to read. 

The church is Brook Hills, located in Bimingham, Alabama. The pastor is David Platt. In addition to pastoring this church, David Platt is also the author of two very popular books: Radical and Radical Together. They are books that have been very transformative and encouraging to me. In his last book, Radical Together, Platt tells the story of a cross roads that he lead his church through. Their church is quite large. It has a multi-million dollar annual budget. When Platt took over as the pastor, the church had some grand plans to build on to their church...a new and better lobby, better parking lots, more class-room space and sports fields just to name a few. But as they discussed these potential investments Platt had some second thoughts. As they were going through the budget process for their church, he asked some very critical and risky questions for a new pastor. Here is an excerpt from his story,

"As a pastor, I believe that is when (setting the budget) the church comes face to face with how prone we are to give our resources to good things while ignoring great need. Christians in North America give, on average, 2.5 percent of their income to the church. Out of that 2.5 percent, churches in North America will give 2 percent of their budgeted monies to needs overseas. In other words, for every one hundred dollars a North American Christian earns, he will give five cents through the church to a world with urgetn spiritual and physical needs. This does not make sense."

These kinds of questions and thoughts kept on plagueing him as he attempted to lead his church through the budgeting process. So Platt and his leaders began to seek God through prayer and studying scripture. They laid all their plans before God and asked Him if their plans were God's best for their community and the world. And as they studied Scripture, God answered. Here is another excerpt...

"As we took this question to Scripture, we saw a clear plan from the mought of Jesus: Make disciples of all nations. Take up your cross, follow me and lead others to follow me in the same way. Jesus never told us to build lobby space, create more class rooms, or design sports fields. Not that it would be necessarily wrong to do these things... When it cam to our plans then, the question was, Is this the best way to align with the plan Jesus has laid before us? Is building a nicer, more comfortable lobby the best way to use our resources to lead people to take up a cross and follow Christ? Is building more space for classes the best way to help people obey Christ?"

He goes on to report how they answered these radical questions...

"And as we asked these questions at Brook Hills, our decision became clear. Instead of expanding the lobby of our church, we would use that money to start planting other churches. Instead of constructing more classrooms where we could listen to more lectures, we would become more intentional about gathering in our homes, where we could better share our lives."

This story restores alot of hope for me in traditional churches with huge budgets around the U.S. And this is not the only good story. There are plenty others. It is also not a story about how great David Platt was to lead his church through all these decisions. Many pastors would have been fired for asking these kinds of risky questions. Really, all of the leaders in this church deserve credit for making radical decisions about their money and resources. I think this is what encourages me the most about this turn around. We don't have to wait for incredibly gifted leaders to change things. They simply sought God through prayer and study of His word and asked God how they could best use their resources. And they said yes to God's plan!

I highly recommend this book. It is a great and challenging read. Platt raises the questions that we should all be asking of ourselves and the ministries that we lead!